God is in control – Page 3

How to lament

I was feeling a bit overwhelmed the other day. Life had me pinned in a corner and the ref didn’t see me trying to tap out. I started looking through scriptures to find passages that could helped me digest my feelings.

I started reading Lamentations 3. I have not spent a lot of time reading Lamentations. It is not a book I know well. Daniel, I’ve read many times – it’s my favourite. But Lamentations, no.

I got about 20 verses into this chapter and I thought, “Holy smokes, this is a bit over the top.” Modern man seems to feel the need to curb our sense of self-pity. I will cry and feel sorry for myself for a bit, but I put parametres around it and often start to think of others who are worse off. At this point in the chapter there didn’t seem to be any breaks or boundaries. Just full out cries of anger and despair, blaming God.

About 20 verses in the tone shifts. Even in the face of this suffering and wailing God is still good. God is still worth waiting on. I’m not sure what lesson to take from this. There are obvious cultural differences as well as the deeper meaning of the book as a whole with which to grapple.

Maybe it helps me see that we can cry out to God, he’s big enough to take it!

Lamentations 3: 24 I say to myself, “The Lord is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

Who’s in charge

My kids are getting old enough to make plans. I’m no longer solely in charge of the family schedule and events. It is fun to watch them take ownership over their time and space. They are more involved in what they want to eat, how their room should look, who they play with, and other aspects of their lives. They are moving from childhood into adulthood. They are learning to control their own world.

In the past my children went where I planned, on my schedule. I, like most good parents, planned events that were age appropriate and that I thought they would enjoy. They had complete trust. They had little or no idea what each day would bring, but they trusted me to work it out. Most times they were happy with my choices.

Maybe this is what Jesus meant when he told us to be more like children. I need to wrestle with my own sense of control and give my life over to God. I need to let him schedule my life and chart my course. I should be like my own children used to be, a happy passenger. Humbly letting him lead.

It’s a struggle. But it is a worthy struggle.

Matthew 18: 2-4 He called a little child to him, and placed the child among them.
And he said: “Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children,
you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever takes the lowly position of this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
And whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.”

We learn from our mistakes

My kids all like to cook. When they were younger it was a highly supervised endevour. Now as they get older it requires that I am close at hand but NOT interfering. I listen and interject when I hear statements like, “it calls for a 1/4 cup of salt.” No. Never, in any recipe, except perhaps a brine do you eve use that much salt. Or my son will ask, “What colour is this?” when cooking ground beef (he’s colour-blind).

I told my husband the other day that most times it is still easier and faster to do things myself. But, then they wouldn’t learn. He laughed and said, “Yeah, like me I had to learn how to cook after I left home.” I explained to him that what he did was keep himself alive, it couldn’t be described as cooking. I’m not a very nice wife!

When faced with my daily struggles there are many times that I wish God would just reach down and do it for me. It would be easier for both of us. But then what would I learn?

Psalm 139: 23-24 Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

Be brave

As a young woman I was exposed to the flavour of my age, through education and popular culture. While the values espoused in my home were very different, I could not avoid these great cultural influences. Much of this was communicated through education, particularly in my University English Literature classes. The view pushed was to see the past through the lens of feminism. The Bible could not be avoided in these classes as it is a perennial and important source throughout Literature. But it was represented as patriarchal and repressive. Our duty, as modern students, was to shake the shackles off and evolve!

Even when I was young I saw this as a lack of knowledge. The people voicing these opinions likely had little knowledge of the text they were abusing. They were making assumptions without full understanding.

Look at Moses, one of the great patriarchs. Proof of the dominance of men in the Judeo-Christian viewpoint. This man sent by God to free the people of Israel from bondage. And yet he doesn’t exist without brave women. Midwives who refuse to kill the male babies born to Israelite women. A brave mother who risks her life and that of her family, by hiding her male infant. Even Pharaoh’s daughter, who recognized the baby she found as a Hebrew baby and who decided to keep it against her father’s orders.

All of these individual acts set up and enable one of the greatest triumphs in the Old Testament. None of these women could have imagined what their small contribution would allow.

So today, when we are called upon to do things, great or small, remember we have no idea what God has planned. Male or female he can use us for His good.

He is righteous

We are conditioned from an early age to perform to a list of expectations. Schools use tools like curriculum and grading to help students understand how well they are doing. In our jobs we have to fulfill the job description and criteria. Often we have yearly reviews to evaluate our performance.

When I had my first child all of this was pulled away. I didn’t have any external way of evaluating my success… until I had the first visit with the health nurse. I was then introduced to all the physical and mental markers that my child should be hitting by certain ages. We even set standards for that.

Given this training, how do we cope with religion? I’m afraid we do the same thing. We set standards of morality and markers, so we can differentiate ourselves from those who don’t believe. This is a human instinct that the biblical writers warned against it. Learning we can’t earn our way to God.

The way it works in the world is that the harder you work the more likely you are to succeed. Therefor, those who are successful can be proud of their wealth and position because they have indeed earned it. This may be true – here. But the grace that God offers is unattainable, even to the most determined and perfect of humans. We can’t be proud of our own righteousness, but we need to rely on His.

It goes against the grain. If we are doing it right it should change the measure stick with which we judge ourselves and others. We should not be envious of those who have more stuff or position. We should not yearn for the ease of life and lack of trouble in our world. We should indeed embrace the path that leads us to acknowledge our own inadequacy.

It isn’t an easy task. It means changing how we see the world and how we see ourselves in it. It means trying to view things in the way God does. No small task.

Romans 4: 1-3 What then shall we say that Abraham, our forefather according
to the flesh, discovered in this matter? If, in fact, Abraham was justified by works,
he had something to boast about—but not before God. What does Scripture say? “Abraham believed God, and it was credited to him as righteousness.”

When will we understand?

Jesus was in a boat with his closest followers. He was talking with them, warning them to be wary of the “yeast of the Pharisees and that of Herod.”

I love this story. Jesus is taking a moment of calm to teach these men. He gives them a piece of advice which they don’t understand. In fact, they start mumbling to each other about what he could mean. They settle on the fact that he’s upset because they didn’t bring enough bread, focusing on his use of the word yeast.

Jesus response shows his disappointment, and he asks them how they could still be missing the point. In modern language his response would be, “Bread! You think I am worried about bread?” He reminds them he just made food materialize for thousands of people, not once but twice. Even after that, they think he’s concerned about the bread.

These men are not prepared for what is about to happen. They are limited in their understanding by what they have already experienced. Nothing that they will soon see can be predicted by the world as they understand it.

We also are trapped by our own view point, by our experiences. It can be hard to fathom what might happen next, or how the events that are ongoing could shape our understanding.

We are very much like these disciples. If Jesus came and spoke to me today I think his words would be the same. He’d likely point out all the miracles he has preformed in my life, that I accepted without question. He’d be disappointed in my lack of understanding also.

Mark 8: 21 He said to them, “Do you still not understand?”

God wins

“The best laid plans of mice and men can still go wrong.” A translation of the famous quote from the poet Bobby Burns. He needed a translator as he didn’t speak English, he was Scottish (I’m joking – wink wink).

I had a visit with a friend yesterday, and she expressed concern about everything going on in our world. If you are paying attention and listening to voices outside of the official televised opinions, it is not hard to feel this way. It seems like we are in the middle of Tolkien’s final battle scene. The forces of evil are being marshaled against the good. The battle is beginning and those on the side of right haven’t pulled their team together. It’s terrifying really.

But then we have the story of Esther. The simply written, beautiful story of Esther. A woman who found herself in a position of great influence, “for such a time as this.” Esther’s bravery and intelligence are of course at the heart of this story. But as you read this book it isn’t really about Esther. She is an instrument. The real conflict is between Mordecai and Haman.

Haman has all the official power. He has all the clout. A large gallows is erected at his command. His plan is ready and all he has to do is bring the pieces together. Haman is confident in his ability to see his plan through. He plans the demise of Mordecai and all his relatives. But he is unaware of all the connections behind the scenes. He doesn’t realize Esther’s connection to Mordecai.

No human has access to all knowledge. No one person can see all the inputs that can affect a situation. We have an illusion of control, but in reality it can slip through our fingers without warning. Haman ends up being hanged by his own gallows.

The Jewish people still celebrate this great turn of events. A constant reminder through the generations that those who go against God and his people will come to ruin.

Remember when it feels like we are up against it, there is One who does see all and know all. There is One who cares that good wins. God wins!

Esther 9: 28 These days should be remembered and observed in every generation
by every family, and in every province and in every city. And these days of Purim
should never fail to be celebrated by the Jews—nor should the memory of
these days die out among their descendants.

Finding an old acquaintance

Last week I was reminded of the great poet John Donne. My experience of his work was narrow. A few sonnets and poems covered in entry level anthologies. I remember loving his visual imagery and use of metaphors. It was a fleeting introduction. I didn’t study any of his works after that.

I moved on to study other great writers. In fact, I was so unaware that I didn’t know he had a body of sermons and meditations. I was so ignorant that I thought the phrase “for whom the bell tolls,” was a title of a Hemingway novel. That is true, but he got it from somewhere – John Donne.

I was listening to this recording on YouTube. At one point in this reading John Donne makes a comparison. Imagine you own gold or silver bullion but are not able to use it because it’s not shaped in the currency of the lands in which you are traveling. He then suggests that suffering is the same. It’s value does not get paid out in earthly currency. We start to understand its real value as we get closer to our real home.

This is such a stunning metaphor. I guess it goes back to the “storing up our treasures in heaven” idea. But with a twist. I love that our suffering isn’t pointless. This has been one of the biggest myths created by the materialist. We live, we suffer, we die. No purpose to any of it. Nature and evolution march on.

If this is true, then the suffering of man is of the greatest evil. The gazelle in the savanna dies a horrible death at the hands of the pride of lions. But, her death feeds that family and allows them to continue on, there is a purpose. Man is not afforded that if there is no afterlife, no reward for suffering.

Take some time and listen to this, it is worth the time.

John Donne ‎– Sermons And Meditations (1956) Caedmon ‎– TC 1051 – YouTube

Turning over my anger

I saw a fellow today that has done work for Wes in the past. It has not been a good year for his business. He was smiling and happy to chat, but he was open about how difficult life has been. He said, “I’ve been through hard times before, but I can’t see us recovering from this one.”

My heart ached for him. I don’t think we’ve even scratched the surface of the economic hardship or the turmoil. For those of you who have been able to pivot and keep going, good for you. But many people haven’t been able to do that. This business of stop and go, stop and go economy has ruined them.

I feel helpless and angry.

But resentment doesn’t help. Anger doesn’t help. Anger and resentment only destroy. They don’t build. I don’t have within me the power to fix anything. I can’t make people see sense or heal the hurts of those around me.

But God can.

What I can do is give my anger to God. I can pray for this man and his family. I can pray for my neighbours. I can pray for my own hurts.

God is the answer.

Isaiah 35: 5 Then will the eyes of the blind be opened and the
ears of the deaf unstopped.

Remember

I remember getting the seed catalogue. Pouring over its pages and dreaming about all the potential, while the snow lay thick on the ground. My thoughts catapulted to spring for a few short moments, while the pages lay open on my lap. I could forget the frozen world around me and recall that beneath it lay the promise of spring.

But I have other memories too. A long list. I store them and sort them, like the seed catalogue. I’m digging in my past for the promises buried there, like the bulbs below the layer of snow. The times God saw me through difficulty. When I felt helpless and he offered aid. Memories from the annals of my life.

There is enough there to give me courage, if I take time to read through them. Like the Seed catalogue this internal list offers hope as I sift through my memories. My past offering hope to my now, like a flower full with blooms in the summer.

I sit and I remember what God has done.

Psalm 77: 11 I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes,
I will remember your miracles of long ago.