Tag: Trust God

Renewal is hard

I am sitting here listening to an instrumental version of the beautiful song “Breath of Heaven.” It is lovely to hear but it got thinking… this is sometimes how I see renewal. I ask God to renew my spirit and I sit and wait for the Holy spirit to pour over me and renew me. Maybe this happens to some people. Not me.

As anyone who has lived through a renovation can tell you it is a messy business. Everything is dusty, ripped apart and nothing works. On top of that the rebuild can seem to be endless. When you are living without a sink the wait for cabinets, carpenters, counters, plumbers, tile setters etc., can seem endless. And the outcome only seems to be increased visits to the chiropractor, to deal with the strain caused by doing dishes in the bathtub.

It is hard. Waiting and wading through mess. This is what renewal is like. The hard work of dealing with our old toxic habits or beliefs while allowing God to slowly rebuild our inner framework.

Maybe the breath of God blew over you and in a moment you gave your life to him, but you still have a lot of work to do, albeit now with the help of God.

If we ask God to renew us we need to be prepared for some difficulties. But it is worth it. Any suffering, hardship, rethinking or change of life if worth it if it brings us closer to God.

James 4: 7 – 10 Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. 
Come near to God and he will come near to you. Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Grieve, mourn and wail. Change your laughter to mourning and your joy to gloom. Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up.

How to do it

I am a practical person. Whenever I seek advice or help, I always ask, ‘What does that look like?’ or ‘How exactly do I do that?’

In life I have been asked, on more than one occasion, to step out in faith and trust that God will look after my future. Sometimes the path forward has been clearer than others.

Recently we have been in a situation where we took a big step off the cliff and believed that God will answer our prayers. At this point it looks like He has a different answer in mind. It can make me feel like he isn’t willing to catch us this time. That he isn’t answering our prayers.

Regardless of my feelings about it I know he is sovereign. How do I maintain my faith and belief in God’s goodness when things seem to be going off the rails. I don’t mean what encouragement do I gather, or how do I intellectually process it, but rather how do I do it?

It came to me late last night. God gave us an example of what to do. He provided a model.

Matthew 26: 36-39 Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to his disciples, “Sit here, while I go over there and pray.” And taking with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, he began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then he said to them, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death; remain here, and watch with me.” And going a little farther he fell on his face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.” 

Do not worry

I was not a worrier when I was young. I had endless confidence in God’s guidance. I felt anxious about the future sometimes, but not to a point where I would consider it consistent worry.

After suffering many blows from life and having to face difficulties, I now worry. I will worry about the most outlandish things. I expect bad things to happen.

My friends, some Christian and some not, who buy into the new age teachings tell me that by expecting bad things I invite these sufferings into my world. That if I had positive energy and positive focus bad things wouldn’t happen. That is not only rubbish, but it also puts the responsibility for the bad things on the person suffering them. It is victim blaming.

No, I don’t need to channel my positivity to dig my way out of a worry pit. I need to read what Jesus said. I need to focus on His words. I need to trust God.

Matthew 6: 28-34   “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you—you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. 

But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

Letting God lead

I was listening to a Scottish preacher that I enjoy, and he started his sermon with what he called an “old Anglican prayer.” I had never heard it before. I am staggered by its profound simplicity.

It went, “Father, what we know not, teach us. What we have not, give us. What we are not, make us. For your Son’s sake. Amen.”

What I like most about these poignant thoughts is that they have the correct order. Much of the praying I do is God, if it’s your will, help me do this, or that. I am specifying what I think needs to be done. In fairness, I am open to His guidance, but I am the one doing the thinking.

This little prayer puts the ball in God’s court. It recognizes that he understands the bigger picture and will have a view that I don’t have. By petitioning him in this manner I allow him to guide my life. He is in charge of what I need to learn, or have or be. Not me. My vision for the future is subservient to His.

This is one of life’s hardest lessons. For me this is a daily struggle. I see what others around me are doing, I see the successes they have, the direction, the sureness and then I look at my own life (which is a complete mess). I have no idea what to do next, but I feel the weight of action. I have no idea how to fix my problems, but I feel the guilt of inactivity. I have no idea how to relate to the world but I feel the judgment of all around me.

This prayer helps me, in a very practical way, hand it all to God.